Friday the 13th…

May kasabihan tau na pag pumatak daw ang 13 ng biernes, siguradong may kamalasan na darating… Isang malaking unos ang ngyari sa buhay ko. Nag desisyun ako ngaung araw na ito na tuluyan ng makipag break kay Bhe… Nag move out na ako sa aming love nest… Valentines day pa naman bukas huhuhu..

Pero alam ko na makakabuti para sa aming dalawa ang naging desisyon ko na ito. Sobrang sakit, pero hindi na healthy ang relationship, halos araw araw na kami nag aaway. Bakit nga ba kami nag aaway? Iisa lang ang dahilan at ito un…

June of 2007 nakilala ko si Bhe thru common friend, that tym I still have a BF in US. At sya naman ay engaged for his 5 year GF that tym. Nakalimot ng isang gabi, at nag kasundo na magkaroon ng relationship without commitment. Isang laro ng pagmamahal na nauwi sa seryosohan, simula pa lang alam ko na sobrang mahal nya si GF, wala naman ako talagang balak na agawin o sirain ang relasyon nila. Nagdecide lang ako na mahalin na sya ng tuluyan ng kinwentu nya sa akin ang tunay na estado ng relasyun nila ni GF, 5 years nga ang relationship nila pero never pa silang nagkita dahil nagkarelayun lang sila dahil sa txt at tawag lang, May of 2007 pinilit nyang makarating Laoag, dahil ito ang sinasabi ng gurl na address nya at saan ka nakakita ng GF na pumunta na lahat lahat ang BF mo sa malayo mong probinsya at sasabihin mo lang na YOU HATE SURPRISES.. what the heck… nagbyahe sya ng subrang layo at hindi mo ituturo ang tunay mong address at sana man lang ay nakipagkita ka man lang. After kong malaman ang lahat ng yun, alam ko na niloloko lang ni GF si BF…

Ilang beses kami naghiwalay ni Bhe, pero ako din ang sumusuko.. Pinilit kong iwork out ang relationship, pero napakarami ding instance na talagang mahal nya si GF, nagpakatanga ako ng 2 years hoping na makakalimutan nya si GF at matatauhan cya. Ginawa ko ang laahat para sa akin mabaling ang pagmamahal nya, pero bigo pa din ako.. Sabi nga ng mga friend ko ako ay isang babaeng bakla, halos binili ko ang buo nyang pagkatao, pero talo lang ako.. Hindi nya talaga kayang kalimutan si GF, napakaswerteng babae. At ipinagtapat nya din sa akin na hanggang ngaun ay magkatxt pa din sila at kahit daw tumanda na sya hihintayin nya pa din ang araw na magkakasama sila ni GF. Sobra na akong talo.

Kulang ang isang blog para masabi ko ang lahat ng sinakripisyo ko para sa kanya.. Kinalimutan ko ang sarili kong buhay para sa knya, nawala ang mga kaibigan ko ng dahil sa knya.. Mas nauna pa akong natauhan, sabi nga ng cousin ko “all you need is a time for yourself at iisa lang ang pwede mong itanong MASAYA KA PA BA?”.. Pinag isipan ko ang desisyon ko na ito ng halos tatlong buwan, sobra kong mahal si Bhe.. Pero pwede mo palang mahal ang isang tao pero hindi ka na masaya.. Siguro kakayanin ko na lang ang isang sakit kesa nasasaktan ako ng araw araw.. Mahirap pilitin ang isang tao kung hindi ka nya kaya talagang mahalin.

Friday the 13th, isang araw na hindi ko makakalimutan , it is the worst day of my life but still expecting that I can move forward.. Start new life.. Try to be happy, and try put the shattered pieces of your life into a better life.. All i need right now is time to love myself again and bring back the love of my true friendships…

Is He The One?

It’s a great mystery how we fall in love. They say that when you meet the One, time stops, and everything around you disappears except for him. I believe that you only feel it that way, when after a long time you recall the moment of your first encounter.

But, there is a big difference between falling in love with someone and finding the right person for you. And because “the logic of the heart is absurd”, you should maybe trust your logical instincts before you trust your heart.

These are the signs if he is the one?

1. He is not afraid to hold your hand when you are walking down the street, and he doesn’t hesitate to kiss you in public.

2. When he introduces you to his friends he says: “This is the girl I was telling you about”.

3. He is the first person you want to say “good morning” when you wake up and the last one you wish to say goodnight to.

4. He brings you a glass of water before you say that you are thirsty.

5. He will laugh at your jokes even if they are silly.

6. Life seems worthwhile when you are with him.

7. You never think of the past, you never worry about the future.

8. He is the person you would call, if you could make only one call.

9.You don’t worry if your job sucks; you don’t care if everything else is wrong in your life as long as you sleep in his arms.

10.You don’t NEED to talk.

11. Even when you are alone, you don’t feel alone.

12. Time with him is never enough. Time without him seems to pass so slowly.

if you have these 12 Signs, you can actually say that HE IS THE ONE..

Unfulfilled Wish

Our God is a good planner, His plan never thwarts and his ball pen never has wrong words to write and never even looses ink. Part of his plan is for us to be with someone someday, in the time and event the Lord would allow us to meet.

Sometimes you feel you’ve met the person whom you want to spend the rest of your life with. When that happens, you’ll know in your heart that this person is the one for you. But sometimes, things don’t end up the way we want them to be. So we have to learn how to wait.

How can we ever find true love if we are too impatient to wait for it right? Waiting is a good thing only if something is worth waiting for. And how will you know if it’s worth it? Your gut feel, your heart and your mind.

Is it good to expect while waiting? They say its better to hope. It’s not wrong to expect but expecting means you’re waiting for something to definitely happen. And hoping means you’re open to either side of the coin.

So WAIT and HOPE but never EXPECT. Still loving you, but you gave up… Miss you so much (You know who you are.. honey)

The Reason…

People come into your life for a reason, a
> season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is,
> you will know what to do for that person. When
> someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually
> to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to
> assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with
> guidance and support, to aid you physically,
> emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a
> godsend and they are. They are there for the reason
> you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on
> your part or at an inconvenient time, this person
> will say or do something to bring the relationship
> to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk
> away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a
> stand. What we must realize is that our need has
> been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
> The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it
> is time to move on.
>
>
>      Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
> because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
> They bring you an experience of peace or make you
> laugh. They may teach you something you have never
> done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount
> of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a
> season.
>
>
>      LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime
> lessons, things you must build upon in order to have
> a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept
> the lesson, love the person and put what you have
> learned to use in all other relationships and areas
> of your life. It is said that love is blind but
> friendship is clairvoyant.
>
>
>      Thank you for being a part of my life, whether
> you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.